All I Want is More Recess.....

Shout out to Childhood.

Maaaaan, how I miss those innocent days of mom-guided fashion, daydreams of M&M's for dinner, lack of a significant educational grading system, and my skill of general time wasting.....I pray this bad boy be invented soon enough so that I may go back to cutting up dead frogs in the backyard, remaining eco-friendly by not showering daily, and having no idea of how strenuous females and their cooties would become in my very near future.....

Where's The Lotion...

Shout out to The 40 Year Old Virgin.

A staple in our generation of realistic comedies, this film captures the essence of how an extended lifetime of virginity can devolve a man what I call "a lame". Surely Steve Carrell's actual no-booty gettin experience up to the start of his fame inspired him so have such a spot on performance. His posse of dope niggas, including Seth Rogen, also explores the complexities that follow once a vaginal enterprise has been established. I'll let YouTube explain....

She was a hoe, For Shooo...

Nigga, fire off...

You Know How I Know You're Gay...

I Call You Son, Because You Shine Like One

Shout out to the Light Skinnded.

To all my fellow sunny lookin bruthas and sistas out there, let's take a moment to recognize our daily achievement in hater's resistance and applaud the obvious dopeness we possess with which we use to create envy within our negro community. And, as an added bonus, our assimilation amongst the whites permitted us to be them indoor slave niggas back in the day. Hmm, I wonder if that's natural selections way of keepin us out the sun and not lookin like a half burnt piece of charcoal.....intriguing.

Yes, we can write...

*Look how hard chick up top is mean muggin right now....lol

F@%$ I. N.ever A.ctually L.earned this S#%!

Shout out to Finals Week.

Oh how I loathe the accursed series of trivial evaluations, administered upon a fashion of absent regard for the fastidious minds of the wary. Frivolous quieres leave me pondering the significance of the erudition and the essence of it's counterpart afflictions. Damn thee! Alas, soon I will find relief in the employment of drink and hash. And, again.... I will be merry.

How Long is This Damn Path?

Shout out to Obscurity.

Essentially my most important virtue to follow day to day, blending in with the norm gives me not only a sense or worthlessness, but of inner gratification. Knowing that my 1980's style rebellious isolationist existance has had little to no significant impact on the unified series of events that we called Living clearly reflects the grief that I internally portray to myself as a mechanism of resolve. Bravo, young sir.

Knights On a Chess Board....

Shout out to The All City Chess Club.

Thanks, once again, to the constantly Daydreamin' mind of a Mr. Lupe Fiasco and friends, the nerds are at it again in collaboration for Lu's upcoming I'm Beaming Remix. The track is preparing to include a plethora of fresh meat mixed with some heavy hitters such as: Diggy Simmons, Wale, Asher Roth, J. Cole, B.O.B., Richard Hamilton, Blu, The Cool Kids, and of course, the smooth sounds of a sir Skateboard P......I think I need an Aspirin.

Bless You

Shout Out to Sneezing.

I think our bodies deserve some sort of positive recognition for having the natural ability to expel countless germs, lodged in the ooz that is mucas and saliva, at a very impressive 100+ MPH upon irittation. Not to mention, the fake sneeze/water spray to the back of a homeboy's neck always has a nigga madder than a swarm of honeybees on a hot afternoon in July....damn I been in Georgia too long.

Keeping the Viagra Market Alive.......

Shout out to Elderly Boning.

It's strange that as soon as I begin to cultivate a mental image of how these obscene acts could possibly even take place, it's as if my mind automatically activates my better judgment mode and whips on that parental block....thank you Brain. I've been told that women are better with age, much like a fine wine, but I don't think the same nigga would agree with that comparison once those grapes turn to raisins.....

*Warning, if you are old and you try to have sex, you'll probably die of a heartattack or something.....SO DON'T DO IT.

SB2010!!!

Shout out to Spring.

The fact that there is a natural occurence of season annually that not only influences those more-than-necessary flesh showing outfits the ladies bust out just to tease a niggas "i wanna touch" instincts, but also causes most young people to disregard all of societies standards on a beach somewhere in Cabo, leaving a trail of Miller Light cans, used condom rappers, and the ever so common swimsuit top laying discarded because Girls Gone Wild told its previous owner that her boobs could make her famous.....it amazes me.

OhledoAwayWithit

Shout out to One More Product of Yester Year.

I'm officially declaring radio {negro stations in particular} not only expendable, trivial, and remedial, but down right offensive to our already suffering modern culture. Glorifying the heralds of ignorance and it's iminent social deviants, music is at an all-time low. If it were'nt for the splendor on illegal downloads and our inborn sense of selective hearing, I might have already gone ahead and mercked myself with an isolated 24-hr Wacka Flocka jam session. Somebody please beat that niggas ass again.......

More Than A Game

Shout out to March Madness.

Narrated by the sounds of Dicky V. and overhyped, beligerant college students, the greatest spectacle of sports entertainment takes place each year in a tournament of champions; where the the blood, sweat, and tears are shadowed by the fact that some nigga just lost 50 bucks betting on a #1 seed that just lost to Northern Iowa of all places. S#@! man, sorry homie you aint gettin' ya money anytime soon.......

Uhh Uhh Girlfrieeend....

Shout out to Flambouyance.

Are you really that gay nigga? Damn, you like two more finger snaps from becoming a lady bruh. Aside from the mini skirt, permed extensions, and pre-teen giggle you got there, I'm safe to say my assumption is true; no need to prove a point you homo. And, wow. Check this chick out. She actually has the world SLUT tattooed cross them protruding showcase melons....Aside from the uber-mini skirt, designer prostitute wig, and whorish giggle, I'd already assume your were easier than a 3rd grade special ed spelling bee.....

*I know, the pictures kinda gross...

Relax and Take Notes

Shout out to the Notorious B.I.G.

Today marks the yearly anniversary of the the late Christopher Wallace, aka Biggie Smalls. Though the conflicts of his gangster lifestyle left him without the help of divine intervention, Biggie blessed us with an array of hardcore lyricism, effortless flow, and alternative appeal, defining a legacy in a shorter time span than most could create in a century. Much love, Big.

R.I.P. Christopher George Latore Wallace (May 21, 1972 – March 9, 1997)

From the beginning...

Middle

...And the End

Cleanin Out the Pipes.....

Shout out to Self-Gratification.

Though initially hesitant to the fact that I was indeed performing some semi-homo act of deflowering myself on a consistant basis, I've become accustomed to the idea that I just dont give a -->WHAT!<--. Proceeding events have clouded my judgment and left me in a daze of both satisfaction and shame. But, can you blame me? They say before you can love anyone else, you must first LOVE yourself right.....teehee.

*Shout out to those independent filmmakers such as the infamous Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton for your assistance in my endeavour....much love.

Your Stomach's Not Growling, It's Crying....

Shout out to A Bum's Paradise.

The buffet is what I call a good concept gone horribly wrong. Relieving human beings of any understanding of what is TOO MUCH, a smorgishborg (you like my wording there huh) of grease filled, artery clogging, diarrhea inducing entrees and deserts leaves one feeling temporarily satisfied until your extended toilet catastrophe earns you a trip straight to the emergency room. So, eat up. You'll need your strength for the fight against heart failure later on......

*Side shout out to the salad bar, which ain't doin shizzy but giving us another healthy option to decline....

At least you could make a music video...

...Televised too??