F@%$ I. N.ever A.ctually L.earned this S#%!

Shout out to Finals Week.

Oh how I loathe the accursed series of trivial evaluations, administered upon a fashion of absent regard for the fastidious minds of the wary. Frivolous quieres leave me pondering the significance of the erudition and the essence of it's counterpart afflictions. Damn thee! Alas, soon I will find relief in the employment of drink and hash. And, again.... I will be merry.

SB2010!!!

Shout out to Spring.

The fact that there is a natural occurence of season annually that not only influences those more-than-necessary flesh showing outfits the ladies bust out just to tease a niggas "i wanna touch" instincts, but also causes most young people to disregard all of societies standards on a beach somewhere in Cabo, leaving a trail of Miller Light cans, used condom rappers, and the ever so common swimsuit top laying discarded because Girls Gone Wild told its previous owner that her boobs could make her famous.....it amazes me.

More Than A Game

Shout out to March Madness.

Narrated by the sounds of Dicky V. and overhyped, beligerant college students, the greatest spectacle of sports entertainment takes place each year in a tournament of champions; where the the blood, sweat, and tears are shadowed by the fact that some nigga just lost 50 bucks betting on a #1 seed that just lost to Northern Iowa of all places. S#@! man, sorry homie you aint gettin' ya money anytime soon.......

Let's End Global Hunger the Right Way....

Shout Out to Ramen.

Much appreciation to you my friend, for your noodles have surely saved countless college students around the world from the Hands of Starvation.....Mastering the art of convenience and price, you have helped many overcome the tragic symptoms of "broke-nigger-syndrome", a formidable deterrent that has the potential of pandemic. As I savor your lack of taste, I smile because your shallow value only cost me a couple nickels I found in the laundry room the other day......

Your Future is Bright!

Shout out to College Bums.

I'm talkin bout them niggas that know damn well they aint students, but are livin such worthless lives that they got nothing better to do than walk around campus disgracing the hell out of the negro race. I'ma just let yall bum niggas know, the females aint feelin you and your eight-years-outa-high-school-but-still-wearin-the-same-4xL-gear style too much bruh. I'm just helpin yall out, brutha to brutha. And yah, old white dudes do it on occasion too, but they're usually just pshycotic rapists stalking their next score of females to dismantle their womanhood, so they don't really count......